My Dear Miss Tulip,

A bargain is a bargain, right? I said that I would write you every day and I’ve missed a couple of them. I know that you won’t read the words, most likely no one will read them but me. Originally when we talked, I thought our letters would make a great book and I still think they would, but I realized that there are many things we’ve said over the years that would be considered private and I’m not sure you or I would want the conversation public. On the other hand, Grandma’s notes in her little journal were private too, but oh so important when you want to have a clear picture of who she was and what she overcame. Something to think about.

It rained hard last night. For a moment I thought it was hailing, the water hit so hard. Lightning accompanied it along with the sound of rolling thunder. It was music to my ears. This morning there is still a bit of a drip, drip, drip coming off the roof and I’m not sure what todays weather will bring.

Speaking of, and since you are not going to read this note, I got the feeling that for you, there is suddenly an awkwardness in staying on this earth any longer. You have said your goodbyes to everyone that matters and you’ve been dropped off at the airport (in theory) only to find that your flight has been delayed. Everyone is standing there wondering if they should stay and visit with you, and you are wondering if they might just leave and let you read the book you brought along for the flight. After all, everyone has said everything they need to say, right? There is an ease in just being alone for awhile, reading a book or just wandering away in your mind until you board the plane. Just a few thoughts I have early in the morning.

God has a sense of humor. I know it’s a title to a book somewhere, but I think it’s true. Life means so much and yet so little in the grand scheme of things. Maybe for God, there is room for a bit of patience pushing situations, just because or maybe just for fun. I’m not saying that he wants to see us suffer, but again, maybe in the big picture it really isn’t suffering, it’s just a tug at the tail of the cat or a push to be more cheerful or grateful or a sigh at our existential crisis we believe we are in. Our suffering in order to find out who we are is a bit of a patience wearing thin sort of thing for God. “What style of hair cut will make me look thinner, or younger or smarter?” “Why is chocolate cake so good?” “Do these pants let people know that I mean business?” “Why doesn’t everybody like me?’ ‘Is Snowbound a good color for the walls of my kitchen and if I choose Silver Thorn instead of Snowbound, will I be forever sorry that I picked this color?” Yes, God is probably starting to sigh. You have decided that you are leaving and God has decided that you will stay a bit longer, laying in your bed with your eyes closed, sweating in your nightgown and silently thinking this all sucks. God figures you will be leaving soon, but a few more days of sweating will make the exit that much sweeter. Well, I’m sure God wishes that I would stop putting words in God’s mouth and get back to suffering in my own life. Maybe he is silently screaming “SNOWBOUND!! Pick Snowbound for the wall color on your walls! You will never be sorry and I won’t have to hear about it ever again!”. Oh God, how I love you and I know you love me.

Once again, I’m exiting this letter. I love you Tulip and I hope you are warm and dry in your downstairs apartment.

Love,

Miss Snowbound